Welcome to One Thing Better. Each week, the editor in chief of Entrepreneur magazine (that’s me) shares one way to achieve a breakthrough at work — and build a career or company you love.
Today’s edition is sponsored by Public— a platform where you can invest in stocks, bonds, and more —all in one place. Details at the end of the newsletter.
You’ve been through it.
A layoff. A failed project. A rough season. Maybe more than one.
Now you’re haunted by a worry you can’t shake: What if people can see my failures?
You walk into a room — an interview, a pitch, a meeting — and feel like everyone already knows. Like there’s a sign over your head that says: Not good enough.
But here’s what you need to know: Nobody sees your past except you.
They don’t know your history unless you tell them. They only know what you show them.
Today, I’ll help you walk into a room more confidently — so you show up as someone worth betting on. (Because you are!)
But first, let’s start with someone who’s been through a lot too…
What’s holding us back?
A woman named Sharon recently asked me for advice.
She was laid off. Then she started a business, but it failed. Her personal life struggled. Now whenever she gets a job interview, she asks herself: Who wants to hire someone like me, with my past?
Then she doesn’t get the job, and her fears are confirmed.
Here’s what I told Sharon: You are identifying with your failures. You have made them a part of you — so that you bring them into every meeting.
But it doesn’t have to be this way! People only see what you show them, and they only know what you tell them.
Failures don’t define us; they simply inform us.
When we walk into a room, we are in full control of our story. Embarrassing details are ours to share, only if we want to — on our terms, in a way that helps people better understand us and our strengths.
For example…
What you don’t see from me
Consider this newsletter. It comes out every week. Hopefully you think it’s well done.
But you don’t see the many ideas I tried to write, and threw away. Or the other newsletters that are larger than mine, that I’m envious of. Or my efforts to grow the newsletter, which can result in wasted money and little gain.
No. All you see is what I want you to see — a final product, as good as I could make it.
Now consider me, the guy writing these words.
You don’t see the times I was turned down for jobs. Or the time I got fired. Or when I misspelled a man’s name throughout an entire 3,000-word magazine story, causing one of the most embarrassing corrections of my career. Or my clumsy first weeks as Entrepreneur‘s editor in chief, as I struggled to inhabit the role.
You don’t see the note I got from an editor in 2009, who circled something I wrote and declared it to be “a lot of words with not much substance.”
Except, wait, now you do get to see it — because I’m making the decision to show it to you:
Do you see?
What you see is what I want you to see.
I make the decisions. I tell the story. If I’m going to share a detail, even an embarrassing one, I’ll do it on my terms — and only when it suits me.
Now extend that power to yourself.
Nobody knows your doubt. Nobody knows your rejections, or insults, or slammed doors, or frustrations, or the anxiety that kept you anchored to a chair. These things are not branded on your skin. They’re not stitched into your clothing.
They’re only with you if you choose to carry them.
Start like this. If you’re feeling bruised, ask yourself two questions:
- What do I want people to see?
- What do they need to know, so that they see my vision?
For example, here’s a true-life situation: A few months ago, a large company approached me about a lucrative partnership. We talked for weeks. I sent a big proposal. They ultimately chose someone else.
Boo. I was bummed.
But as I reflected upon it, I realized: I was not the 100% perfect person for them. They found someone who is. And that’s OK.
A few weeks later, I got approached by another potential partner.
Did they know I was just rejected by someone else? No.
Was I going to tell them? I didn’t plan to!
But on the first call, they asked about the kind of partners I work with. And I told them this:
“You know, I was just talking with a potential partner — and although it was a great opportunity, they chose someone else with more expertise in their specific area, and I think that’s great. Here’s why: I only want to work with brands where I’m a 100% fit — so that I’m delivering exactly the value you need. So I’m excited to explore whether we’re that perfect fit.”
See what I did there? I told them what they needed to know, so that they can see the story I want them to see.
In this case, that isn’t the story of being rejected. It’s the story of someone who wants to bring immense value. Who doesn’t want to hear that story?
There’s always a good story to tell
Yes, sometimes, people can actually see some of your story. If you apply for a job, for example, they’ll look at your resume — and if there are gaps in it, they’ll wonder why.
That’s just another opportunity for great storytelling.
Remember Sharon, the woman who was laid off and then started a failed company? That experience is on her resume. So is a gap of employment.
So I asked Sharon: What positive story can you tell about that? And we came up with one. Sharon started a services business because she’s passionate about helping people — and although it didn’t work out, it taught her a ton about customer service, and grit, and budgets, and those are skills she’s now eager to bring to her employer.
When she told that story, she started getting called back. Last week, she told me: “I finally got the offer I’d been waiting for.”
Nobody sees your past except you.
So show them the version you believe in.
That’s how to do one thing better.
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